The News...

Henry finally has a baby sister! And Ellen and I are new proud parents of the most beautiful Bengali girl!

It has been quite a day to say the very least. This morning we woke up to room service knocking on the door and after a somewhat sleepless night interrupted by lingering thoughts of what the day would bring, I hopped out of bed and wrote the morning blog over a cup of coffee. Henry woke up saying, “Love is here! I love you mommy and your mommy loves you.” We poured over the emails and posts, consuming each word with tears and laughs. It was a morning filled with organizing, kissing Henry, and trying to push the lump back down our throats while squelching the butterflies in our stomachs. We could not believe the day was here. Ellen and I talked about how we were feeling, both the good and the bad. How unbelievable this whole thing was and how much our hearts ached and swelled. Time kept marching forward. We wanted it to stop for a while. Just long enough to hold onto each moment with what we had always known, the life we have made to this point. We wanted to remember with fondness the three of us. We wanted Henry to understand, truly understand, we have enough love for both him and his sister. Time kept marching forward. We were an hour and a half from leaving to go to pick her up. I told Ellen I needed to run out for another shave, confirm reservations in New Delhi, and arrange a car for the day. I got back with 45 minutes left and Henry ran to the door and said “I’m ready to go pick up my baby sister!” So we called to ask if the driver was ready and left with two large sacks of clothes, a packed diaper bag and camera in hand.

The trip to the center took 45 minutes to get 3 miles. The traffic was a welcome distraction to the nerves we were feeling. We talked with Henry, held hands, exchanged smiles and kisses while our eyes welled up with tears. Finally we arrive and were swept into a non-descript building except for the dozens on pieces of baby clothing hanging from the outside of the building windows. We were led by a young man who didn’t seem to speak any English, but was very polite. After passing a few guards, we went up a flight of open stairs and into a very small office. We could hear babies crying, babbling, and the general noise you would hear in a center with infants and small children. The walls were as such it gave a hollow feel and the noises echoed throughout. In came the director, Ms Anju Roy. She may have been in her 50’s. Her eyes and her disposition was one of complete calm. Her English was as great as her patience as we asked many questions to gain insight into her first year of life. Her face would glow as she began telling us stories of how Tess is the one who is always laughing. She is the one who all the other kids go to when they crawl around because she always tries to lift them up and loves to play. She was known to crawl from crib to crib to play with the other kids. But over and over again, they talked of her happiness and her constant sweet expression.

After a half hour or so she asked if we were ready to meet her. My God our hearts were about to jump out of our chests. Henry perked up and was smiling from ear to ear. We walked out of the office and around a small corner into the room where she was asleep.

Now at this point, my head went into a fog. It was like a power surge in your home. I felt like I was having an out of body experience. There must have been 15 cribs placed all around a small room. Some kids were up, others asleep. They seemed to be in awe as we came into the room. Everyone was quiet including the 4 Ayahs (caregivers). One of the ayahs walked aver and picked up a sleeping Tess and she strained to look around the room in the haze of her nap. Henry ran over to her and we followed. We waited a moment to take her but immediately began stroking her and speaking to her. I think we were the only ones in the room who spoke English so as we were speaking to her, no one, including Tess, understood anything we were saying. I took her first. She leaned against me and put her arms around me. She then leaned back to take another look at this stranger. Ellen took her soon after. She kept looking at me. I think it was the fact she wasn’t use to seeing men. After many pictures and long goodbyes we made our way out. The entire process seemed to happen in a flash. We felt like we should have stayed the day, but they were comfortable with the routine and everything flowed without our control. How do you tell someone how much you truly appreciated what they have done for this little girl the first year of her life when they don’t understand anything you are saying?

But we made our way to the car with Tess wanting nothing more than to be in Ellen’s arms and raced through the streets of Kolkata to return to the hotel.

I will write more details about the rest of the day later. It is 6:30 at night and we have seen her laugh out loud and cry with the pain of not knowing where or why she is here with us. We can already see the struggles and hardships, the complete joy, the exultations and the questions to come. How do we leave the life we know and begin the life to come? How will Henry embrace his sister? We don’t know how to comprehend and understand it all. Perhaps we never will. All we know at this point our little girl needs our love, our devotion, and her diaper changed.